We constantly listen to our community, and every so often, we come across some incredible stories that move us. One such story is from Chris Pombonyo, a single, gay, soon-to-be dad who is sharing his journey of becoming a father through egg donation and surrogacy.
In celebration of Pride Month, Chris agreed to share with us some more details and the ups and downs of his incredible journey to becoming a single dad as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community. By opening up about his experiences, Chris hopes to inspire and encourage others who are thinking about taking the same path.
Q: Can you please share a bit about your journey to single parenthood? What are you expecting for the next following months?
Growing up, I always knew I wanted to be a dad. It is something I truly have always felt I was meant to become. As most do, I was waiting for the perfect time, perfect person, to make that happen.
About a year and a half ago, I realized I was more than capable of going through this journey on my own as a single, gay, soon-to-be dad and that's just what I did.
Going through the IVF/Surrogacy process solo has definitely had its challenges and ups and downs, but thanks to my amazing agency, fertility clinic, doctors, selfless egg donor, my AMAZING surrogate, and an incredible community surrounding me, that dream is now becoming a reality.
My surrogate is currently 11 weeks pregnant with the baby due this December! Over the course of the next 6 months, I anticipate a lot of firsts, a lot of anxiously waiting, a lot of flying back and forth from Orlando to Pittsburgh to be at appointments with my surrogate, and a whole lot of excitement! I truly cannot wait.
Q: What were some of the biggest challenges you faced along the way, both within the LGBTQIA+ community and in society at large?
Starting a family of your own within the LGBTQIA+ community comes with many challenges along the way.
These include the huge financial component involved, finding an egg donor and surrogate, the waiting throughout the process, etc. Aside from those expected challenges for intended parents, there also comes another layer of judgment from others. People are not afraid to share their unsolicited thoughts, opinions, etc. of what my family should look like.
Trying to drown out the noise during this exciting time has definitely been a challenge, but sadly it is not the first and unfortunately, I know it will not be the last time I will have to encounter it.
That being said, despite the challenges, I am incredibly grateful for my supportive community of family and friends, something I know many members of the LGBTQIA+ community continue to struggle with daily.This is why Pride is so important for meaningful conversations of love and support for the community.
Q: Have you encountered any misconceptions or stereotypes towards the LGBTQIA+ community and parenthood during this process?
Absolutely. I have chosen to share every step of this journey on social media to hopefully inspire others who may want to start a family. With that, comes many people with misconceptions, stereotypes, and honestly... hate.
There have been people who have reached out saying things they would never say to a heterosexual couple having a baby. They have made comments that truly show the work that still needs to be done in the fight for equality. With the continued rise of hateful anti-LGBTQIA+ laws throughout our country, it is crucial to continue to protect and advocate for the LGBTQIA+ community.
Regardless of religious or political beliefs, your support and love for others can save lives.
Q: What advice would you give to other LGBTQIA+ community members who are considering surrogacy as a path to parenthood?
Don't let anyone dim your light and tell you how you should start your family or what your future family should look like.
People will have a lot of opinions along the way, and may not even understand much of the process, but know that your future child is so lucky to have you. Be sure to do your research before starting the process as there are many moving parts, but IT CAN BE DONE! Through the ups and downs, highs and lows, and all the waiting in between, you are on a journey to becoming an incredible parent.
Q: How did you navigate the process of establishing a good relationship with your surrogate? Are there any tips you would give for anyone that wants to go through the surrogacy process?
This is probably what I'm most grateful for. Luckily I have the most incredible surrogacy agency team who has guided me every step of the way and matched me with the most selfless and amazing surrogate.
We instantly connected from our first match call and have truly been partners in this entire process despite living in different states. We are in constant communication and she has been the absolute best at sharing all the updates, pregnancy milestones, sending pictures, etc. to make sure I'm included in every step of the journey. I truly cannot thank her enough.
Tips for the process...Be patient. The waiting game throughout the process can definitely be challenging each step of the way, so try not to get hung up on a timeline as truly anything can happen. There will be ups and downs and not everything will go as planned and that's okay. This was hard to navigate at first as a solo intended parent, but something I learned very quickly in the process.
And last tip... SPOIL YOUR SURROGATES ladies and gentlemen! They are the most selfless humans and deserve it!
Q: How have the Bond Touch bracelets been helping you with this process?
On my embryo transfer day, I wanted to surprise my gestational carrier (surrogate) with a Transfer Day gift. The package was filled with different surrogacy-related gifts, self-care items, etc. AND probably the thing I was most excited about...a Bond Touch bracelet.
Being in different states throughout the process can be challenging, but Bond Touch bracelets will allow us to stay connected throughout the pregnancy as surrogate and intended parent.
A simple touch to let the other know we're cheering each other on goes a long way. I cannot wait for when the baby starts kicking and moving so she can use the Bond Touch bracelet to let me know. That way I can be a part of that incredible experience each step of the way. The bracelets are such an amazing way to stay connected throughout the process.
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At Bond Touch, our mission is to bring people closer together, making the barriers of time and distance feel smaller.
Our products are designed to enrich all kinds of relationships—not just romantic ones but also friendships and family bonds. And Chris’s journey really shows that.
We truly hope that his story offers comfort and inspiration for anyone who wishes to go through the surrogacy process, or just wishes to understand it a little bit more.
As we celebrate Pride Month, let’s remember that families come in all shapes and sizes, and each path to parenthood is unique and beautiful. It’s about embracing diversity and supporting each other’s journeys. Whether you’re starting a family or simply supporting loved ones, let’s continue spreading love and acceptance everywhere we go, all year long.
